Dear readers, however few in number you are. Actually we think we can count the readers. You, you and you in the corner. We have tried our best to talk about general knowledge stuff and sometimes we have spoken about personal stuff. We know we have not been a success. But hey. we take solace in the fact that we know you have not been a success either. Why would you be reading this else? OK just joking. We actually liked the fact that we had some readers at least. Thank you. It was fun writing to you. But this may be our last blog. If you have not heard, here is the news.
The world is going to end. May 21st. A lot of religious fanatics and other similarly crazy people are abuzz with fact that the earth is going to be a goner. Considering the fact that its already 6PM on the 20th here, we have only some time left. Also, we don't know which time zone is being used. We checked if Australia and New Zealand have vanished already. But they are still there. Considering that God is middle eastern, will he use Jerusalem time zone? or considering the fact that America is the big brother, we are assuming that it will start with EST timezone. We are calm still. We will write this blog drinking a coke. That's how much we will not worry about the world going to end. Have you seen Titanic? Yes. Those idiots with violin die instead of being saved? Imagine us there. Instead of violins, a coke. Que Sera Sera.
Wait.. Didn't people say it was December 2012? Some Mayan calender shit? Well some others point to Bible as the reason, some say Emraan Hashmi is no longer kissing heroines. But we know none of these have been proved. We want to know how this calculation of the year was done. Because there are many different calenders in use. There is a Radio preacher by the name of Harold Camping. A cheap name related pun will ensue and we will not resist. His brain has gone camping. He had been claiming about the end on 21st. But since nothing happened he has now told that its just that the devastation will start on 21st. Make up your mind Grandpa.
Some say doomsday and some say judgement day. What is judgement day? God will come to earth and take the faithful to heaven it seems. How does he select? Is it similar to the rating and appraisal in software companies? Will have a one on one? Do we have to fill out an excel sheet? Being software engineer, we do not have much hopes to in free society, do we? Anyways, lets hope God has not gone corporate. If he did, we do not have much hopes. All the people in higher position are going to be saved and rest of us will be screwed. We are also interested to know how it is going to end. Is it going be slow and painful? Is it going to be water logged? Is it going to be like a nuclear holocaust? or will it be like in H2G2?
We are actually confused if we do want the world to end. We just worked hard and got our lady the dependency visa and she is planning on coming here by June first week. Now see, Dec 2012 in that case would have been fine with us. As our mother said, we need to go back to India in Nov 2012 max. So we would be seeing our family before God gets drunk and trashes the place. Now with May 21st, we have little bit of problem. We have spent a lot of time and energy in completing the process and have listened to the lady nagging about how tiresome the process was. Now if the world ends, that's a whole lot of hours we will never get back.
The good thing about world ending is Justine Beiber is going with it as well. But sad part is we are going to hell and we have a feeling he is quite popular there. We know some of you Beliebers are not going to like the statement. Also for those who do not know those people are they are fans of Justin Beiber. Yes. Such a thing exists. A sad sad thing but true nonetheless. OK no use in bashing one person when there are thousands of people who will definitely be going to hell. Also, we know at least one person will be happy with it. Sharad Pawar. He is going home to meet his elder brother, the red horny one. (we couldn't resist that horn joke about Satan. Manchi joku kaadandi?)
But ever since we got to know that May 21st has been singled out, we are a bit miffed. We would have been happy if it were on our birthday. How awesome would it be? Whats special for birthday people would ask and we would say we are ending the world with an evil grin. Wait... Can we have a cat? We so totally want a cat for that scenario. We would be like a Bond movie villain. Everyone would remember us (Those who survive. The good people. You don't have much chance). Our name would be in shining letters amidst all the lesser mortals. That would have been a great birthday gift. Yes. We know. We have already told you. We are going to hell.
P.S : We know we said we are drinking Coke. That should not be considered as product endorsement. We actually prefer Diet Coke.
The world is going to end. May 21st. A lot of religious fanatics and other similarly crazy people are abuzz with fact that the earth is going to be a goner. Considering the fact that its already 6PM on the 20th here, we have only some time left. Also, we don't know which time zone is being used. We checked if Australia and New Zealand have vanished already. But they are still there. Considering that God is middle eastern, will he use Jerusalem time zone? or considering the fact that America is the big brother, we are assuming that it will start with EST timezone. We are calm still. We will write this blog drinking a coke. That's how much we will not worry about the world going to end. Have you seen Titanic? Yes. Those idiots with violin die instead of being saved? Imagine us there. Instead of violins, a coke. Que Sera Sera.
Wait.. Didn't people say it was December 2012? Some Mayan calender shit? Well some others point to Bible as the reason, some say Emraan Hashmi is no longer kissing heroines. But we know none of these have been proved. We want to know how this calculation of the year was done. Because there are many different calenders in use. There is a Radio preacher by the name of Harold Camping. A cheap name related pun will ensue and we will not resist. His brain has gone camping. He had been claiming about the end on 21st. But since nothing happened he has now told that its just that the devastation will start on 21st. Make up your mind Grandpa.
Some say doomsday and some say judgement day. What is judgement day? God will come to earth and take the faithful to heaven it seems. How does he select? Is it similar to the rating and appraisal in software companies? Will have a one on one? Do we have to fill out an excel sheet? Being software engineer, we do not have much hopes to in free society, do we? Anyways, lets hope God has not gone corporate. If he did, we do not have much hopes. All the people in higher position are going to be saved and rest of us will be screwed. We are also interested to know how it is going to end. Is it going be slow and painful? Is it going to be water logged? Is it going to be like a nuclear holocaust? or will it be like in H2G2?
We are actually confused if we do want the world to end. We just worked hard and got our lady the dependency visa and she is planning on coming here by June first week. Now see, Dec 2012 in that case would have been fine with us. As our mother said, we need to go back to India in Nov 2012 max. So we would be seeing our family before God gets drunk and trashes the place. Now with May 21st, we have little bit of problem. We have spent a lot of time and energy in completing the process and have listened to the lady nagging about how tiresome the process was. Now if the world ends, that's a whole lot of hours we will never get back.
The good thing about world ending is Justine Beiber is going with it as well. But sad part is we are going to hell and we have a feeling he is quite popular there. We know some of you Beliebers are not going to like the statement. Also for those who do not know those people are they are fans of Justin Beiber. Yes. Such a thing exists. A sad sad thing but true nonetheless. OK no use in bashing one person when there are thousands of people who will definitely be going to hell. Also, we know at least one person will be happy with it. Sharad Pawar. He is going home to meet his elder brother, the red horny one. (we couldn't resist that horn joke about Satan. Manchi joku kaadandi?)
But ever since we got to know that May 21st has been singled out, we are a bit miffed. We would have been happy if it were on our birthday. How awesome would it be? Whats special for birthday people would ask and we would say we are ending the world with an evil grin. Wait... Can we have a cat? We so totally want a cat for that scenario. We would be like a Bond movie villain. Everyone would remember us (Those who survive. The good people. You don't have much chance). Our name would be in shining letters amidst all the lesser mortals. That would have been a great birthday gift. Yes. We know. We have already told you. We are going to hell.
P.S : We know we said we are drinking Coke. That should not be considered as product endorsement. We actually prefer Diet Coke.
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